“It is in your silence that all your words are spoken. It is in your silence that your conversation is understood. It is in your silence that you hear the voice of God speaking to you. So be silent to hear and be heard.”
— Gregory Malouf

Understanding Separation

At the root of all human feelings of unease and pain is fear, and fear is a belief in separation: separation from others, and uncertainty of our place in the world in relation to everything and everyone else.

From early on in life, we learn from those around us and through our own experiences that (a) the mind exists within a body, one that is separate from all other bodies, (b) each of us is autonomous and must rely on our own self, and (c) the self-image we create needs protecting. In short, we feel virtually at the whim of life and not the creator of it.

We separate ourselves from anything that exposes our vulnerability – the truth behind the image we make of ourselves. As a result, we blend in to fit in, we protect and defend the image we have made of ourselves; we hide our true feelings and endlessly fight and defend our actions as if by doing so we will master life and be in control of it.

Question: how do you express an authentic, open, and fearless inner YOU if you feel the need to hide aspects of your true Self?

Our past lessons had us believe that we couldn’t rely on the inner Self to guide us through life. What mentor did you have? Were you under-nurtured or overprotected to the point where you felt powerless and unsure, and developed a self-burdened by the lessons you learned?

To understand this reality – a reality we often all too easily deny – we need to connect within. We start with just a few moments. A few moments to feel what it is we feel, to become aware of any unease or pain we experience in our homes, in our relationships, or in what we do and how we act. And to become motivated to think, say, and do in ways that, in time, will rid us of these negative feelings.

From this first realization, we can then feel a level of peace, attract new feelings such as hopefulness, confidence, and joy, and be motivated to act from there.

In other words, changing the thoughts behind the unease will liberate the mind and the body from the limiting beliefs we learned, which are often suppressed deep within.

The more we separate from Self, the more we separate from others and then hide our connection to an inner Self-knowing. A knowing Self has the power to guide us successfully through life. All unease comes from feelings of separation – so, to relieve the unease, we must authentically connect within, and in so doing become more aware.

Once you begin the change, change is inevitable, and life transformational!


One of the most basic ways to reconnect with Self is through meditation: “A moment in silence.” Take a few minutes each day (and any time you feel anxious, stressed, or in pain) to sit silently and tune out the noise of your internal and external critics.

Practice this seven-minute audio meditation at least once each day. Enjoy the relaxation – you deserve it.